A happy quarantine birthday to me

By Jayne Giese
Staff Writer

Twenty-seven-years ago I came into this world.  It was a delightfully chaotic afternoon, or so I’m told.  Most of my family didn’t make it in time for my birth, it had been hours after I arrived before anyone else met me.  Everyone thought my mom was playing an April Fool’s prank when she called and said her water broke. Overall I’m glad these were the events that took place on the day of my birth.  I get to tell this story to people I meet, and they usually laugh when they hear it.  That makes me happy.

Fast forward to today. I get to celebrate my 27th birthday in a unique way this year.  I get to spend this special day quarantined in my house, like the rest of America right now.  I’m not complaining because I know there are many other people who will have quarantined birthdays this year as well.  Since I am not the only unfortunate birthday goer this month, I have decided not to sulk.  Instead, I will share my quarantine birthday bonanza plan.  Maybe it will inspire other April babies to make their own fun during this uncertain time.

The first part of my day will consist of me pulling an all-nighter.  My sleeping patterns have changed during quarantine, and I am fairly certain I’m not the only person this has happened to.  I now can’t fall asleep till about five in the morning, and I don’t wake up till one in the afternoon.  Since I still have online classes and a virtual meeting to attend, I don’t plan on getting much sleep today.  I am far too excited for sleep, and to pass the time until my meeting I will clean my house and drink five cups of coffee.

Once I make it past the virtual class meeting, the real fun would begin.  I’m going to get all dolled up and wear a very trendy spring outfit, like I would for any other birthday.  I will then literally pop open a bottle of champagne and facetime all of my friends.  Since it is my birthday I will make them all take a shot during the facetime chat. Once I feel tipsy enough I am going to start baking.  In my experience, baking is always more fun when you have a little buzz going. (Not recommended to try at home).  I will be baking sugar cookies, apple cinnamon muffins, and strawberry cake.  I will likely eat most of the batter and cookie dough during this preparation period.

Giese with her pet cat.                                          Jayne Giese | The Collegian

After my heart has filled up on its desire of sweet treats, it will be time for a birthday cat nap.  What cat nap would be complete without your pet cat? The answer is none.  You must take a birthday cat nap with your pet.  If you don’t have a pet, go outside and look for a bug. (I’m kidding! I hate bugs).  Once I wake from my much needed nap, I will end my birthday night with an intense game of Uno.  It will be me versus my cat.  He will probably win and his reward will be his favorite milk treats.

As midnight approaches again and it is no longer my birthday, I will be thankful for another year of life.

A quarantine birthday may not be ideal, but I am healthy and I’m safe.  What more could I ask for? Especially during such an uncertain time.